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We all get emotionally overwhelmed in certain times in our lives.
We’ve all been there. The “pile” keeps getting bigger, the emails keep flooding in, and suddenly, you feel paralyzed. When you’re stuck and overwhelmed, it’s easy to slip into a cycle of procrastination, anxiety, and the feeling that you’re simply not “good enough.”
I lived in that spiral for years. I felt like I was losing control over my own life, merely following orders and reacting to everyone else’s needs while my own goals sat on the back burner. It is mostly because I’m perfectionist and I make a huge goals and put myself in situations where I can’t win. Than I beat myself because I couldn’t reach my goals fast.
But then I discovered that I feel emotionally overwhelm as a result of having “too much to do”—it’s a result of lacking a clear system and setting achiavable goals. By correcting two simple habits, I went from feeling paralyzed to being promoted twice in a single year. Then I was laid off, but that’s a whole other story.
Here is exactly how to stop feeling overwhelmed and start leading your life again.
Why We Feel Emotionally Overwhelmed
Overwhelming feelings are not caused only by having “too many things to do.” If that were true, the busiest people on earth would always be the most stressed, but that isn’t always the case.
Emotional overwhelm actually happens when your perceived demands outweigh your perceived resources. It’s not just about your calendar; it’s about your capacity to cope. Here is why it hits so hard:
- The Weight of “Invisible” Decisions: Every unstarted task is a decision you haven’t made yet. This creates “open loops” in your brain that drain your mental battery even when you aren’t working.
- The Fear of Failure: We often feel overwhelmed because we aren’t just afraid of the work; we are afraid of the judgment that comes if the work isn’t perfect. Exactly my case.
- Lack of Agency: As I mentioned with my own experience, feeling like you are just “following orders” creates a sense of helplessness. When you lose the feeling of being in the driver’s seat, your brain triggers a stress response.
According to Mental Health America, chronic overwhelm can lead to a “freeze” response, where the brain literally shuts down productivity as a defense mechanism. Recognizing that this is a biological response—not a personal flaw—is the first step toward breaking the cycle.
How to stop feeling emotionally overwhelmed
1. Create a Vision (Or Someone Else Will)
The biggest reason we feel overwhelmed is that we are missing the “bigger picture.” If you don’t have a clear goal or vision for your life, you are essentially accepting the goals of everyone else. You become a “task-taker” rather than a “life-leader.”
- Define Your Why: Clearly define what you want to achieve in your career and personal life.
- Align Your Tasks: Once you have a goal, every task should be filtered through it. Does this move me closer to my vision? If not, why am I doing it?
When you are in charge of your direction, the “hustle” feels like progress rather than a burden. To dive deeper into the science of why focus matters, check out this guide on the psychology of goal setting.
2. Master the Art of Prioritization
I used to plan my doctor’s appointments and birthdays, but at work, I just did things randomly. Randomness is the fastest route to burnout. To fix this, you need a system to categorize your mental load.
The Eisenhower Matrix
This is the ultimate tool for anyone feeling buried under a to-do list. It helps you divide your tasks into four quadrants so you know exactly what to do with them. It helps to ease the emotionally overwhelmed feelings because it helps you decide what to do with the pile of your tasks.
- Urgent & Important (Do): Tasks that demand immediate attention.
- Important but Not Urgent (Schedule): These are the most critical for your long-term goals. Schedule these in your calendar before they become urgent.
- Urgent but Not Important (Delegate): These create stress but have little impact on your goals. Hand these off to someone else.
- Neither Urgent nor Important (Delete): These are distractions. Have the courage to delete them.
As the Harvard Business Review notes on time management, learning to say “no” to the unimportant is a superpower.
I’ve created a great google sheets template for task management according The Eisenhower Matrix:
3. Implement Execution Tactics
Once you have your priorities, you need a way to actually do the work without the stress.
- Time Blocking: Allocate specific “blocks” in your calendar for specific tasks. This prevents your day from being hijacked by “quick questions” or minor distractions.
- The Pomodoro Technique: If you are struggling to start, tell yourself you will only work for 25 minutes. This focused interval, followed by a 5-minute break, is a proven way to boost productivity and brain health.
4. The “Perfect Ratio”: Don’t Forget to Be Human
We all love the feeling of being important and busy. But if you focus only on work, your life will slowly pass you by. True success is the ability to do well at your business and have the time to sit with friends over a glass of wine or read a book to your kids.
To maintain your edge, you must prioritize:
- Sleep: It’s the ultimate productivity hack for focus.
- Movement: Exercise reduces the cortisol that causes that “overwhelmed” feeling.
- Disconnection: Learn to shut the laptop. Your work will be there tomorrow, but your personal time is non-renewable.
5. Join a Community
If you’re ready to find your purpose and move from “overwhelmed” to “organized,” I invite you to join the my newsletter. And you can also read other articles here.
Talk to you soon 🙂
Dream big, live bigger,
Karolina ☁️